MoviePass debuts an unlimited movie service that may just save cinemas


The notion of creating a “Netflix for theaters” is a tough one — not only do you have to get movie studios on board with your plans, you also have to form partnerships with national theater chains. And let’s face it, neither group is quick to climb aboard a service that disrupts the current ticketing model.

MoviePass debuts an unlimited movie service that may just save cinemas

But MoviePass, a company that’s been trying to crack this nut for some time, may have found the answer. Today MoviePass is debuting a new subscription movie theater service that relies on mobile app check-ins and a proprietary payment card. And best of all, the company has managed to do this without any formal agreements with movie theaters and studios. Leer más “MoviePass debuts an unlimited movie service that may just save cinemas”

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13 Ways To Generate Customer Hate

Let’s face it. Customers are a pain in the ass.

Always asking for annoying things like service, honesty, quality. Always whining if they don’t get what they want.

Well, you’re in luck. Here’s my 13-step process for making sure your customers hate you. Just build these features into your web site. They’re like an internet marketing mullet:
1: The Flash Intro

I’ve written about this three times now. Somehow people still argue with me, saying that 120 seconds of totally pointless dancing raisins, spinning squares and cheesy, porn-inspired music loops is a good marketing tactic.

It’s not. It’s. Just. Not.

How do you feel when they show commercials at the movie theater? They get in the way, right?

So does that nasty, pointless flash intro. It’s like a sleezy sales guy standing outside The Ritz.

Even worse, it drives away the search engines, too.

If you want your customers to hate you, put a nice, long Flash intro on your home page. Even better, make sure there’s no way to skip it.
2: Mouse Trails

Duuuuuuudde. The mouse has, like, a trail and stuff…
mousetrails.png

I can’t think of any purpose for mouse trails except to:

1. Drive me into a mindless rage, so that I turn green, rush through the brick wall in my office and run around the city throwing tanks and stuff.
2. Make your customers wish they didn’t know you.

3: The Blink Tag

If this works, then you need no further explanation.

If it didn’t, count yourself lucky, and never, ever use this tag. If you do, your customers will, I promise, detest you.

(suggested by Deege)

4: The Every Page Link

You don’t really have to link back to your webmaster/designer from every single page of your site. I swear.

Although I probably have a few of those out there somewhere. Cough.

(suggested by Maniactive)
5: Animated Buttons

Use any of these on your site and I will find your server, pour a milkshake into the power supply and then run down the street shrieking with laughter.

anienter3.GIF 2ABOUT_USa.GIF sold22.GIF

And Seanmag just sent me this beaut:

spaceships_010.gif

Which, by the way, is repeated about 40 times on the guilty home page.

And don’t tell me these “catch the customer’s eye”, either. It doesn’t catch their eye. It makes them want to poke it out.

If you want your customers to despise you, use lots and lots of animated buttons.


by ian

Mullet Baby!!!!!!Let’s face it. Customers are a pain in the ass.

Always asking for annoying things like service, honesty, quality. Always whining if they don’t get what they want.

Well, you’re in luck. Here’s my 13-step process for making sure your customers hate you. Just build these features into your web site. They’re like an internet marketing mullet:

1: The Flash Intro

I’ve written about this three times now. Somehow people still argue with me, saying that 120 seconds of totally pointless dancing raisins, spinning squares and cheesy, porn-inspired music loops is a good marketing tactic.

It’s not. It’s. Just. Not.

How do you feel when they show commercials at the movie theater? They get in the way, right?

So does that nasty, pointless flash intro. It’s like a sleezy sales guy standing outside The Ritz.

Even worse, it drives away the search engines, too.

If you want your customers to hate you, put a nice, long Flash intro on your home page. Even better, make sure there’s no way to skip it.

2: Mouse Trails

Duuuuuuudde. The mouse has, like, a trail and stuff…
mousetrails.png

I can’t think of any purpose for mouse trails except to:

  1. Drive me into a mindless rage, so that I turn green, rush through the brick wall in my office and run around the city throwing tanks and stuff.
  2. Make your customers wish they didn’t know you.

3: The Blink Tag

If this works, then you need no further explanation.

If it didn’t, count yourself lucky, and never, ever use this tag. If you do, your customers will, I promise, detest you.

(suggested by Deege)

4: The Every Page Link

You don’t really have to link back to your webmaster/designer from every single page of your site. I swear.

Although I probably have a few of those out there somewhere. Cough.

(suggested by Maniactive)

5: Animated Buttons

Use any of these on your site and I will find your server, pour a milkshake into the power supply and then run down the street shrieking with laughter.

anienter3.GIF 2ABOUT_USa.GIF sold22.GIF

And Seanmag just sent me this beaut:

spaceships_010.gif

Which, by the way, is repeated about 40 times on the guilty home page.

And don’t tell me these “catch the customer’s eye”, either. It doesn’t catch their eye. It makes them want to poke it out.

If you want your customers to despise you, use lots and lots of animated buttons. Leer más “13 Ways To Generate Customer Hate”

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